9 Common College Essay Mistakes To Avoid in Your Personal Statement
/Over the years, I’ve read and edited hundreds of college application essays. I’ve seen the good and bad countless times. The good news is most of the bad is totally avoidable! To help you during your essay writing stage, I’ve recapped my most useful edits below so you can avoid the common mistakes that pop up most often in college admissions essays.
1) Using Bloated Thesaurus Speak
Most students think a higher vocabulary (read: using a thesaurus) will make their essay sound better. That instinct may work for your more formal academic essays, but it’s wrong in the case of the personal statement: the essay should sound how you speak, not a formal academic letter. "Thenceforward" and “heretofore,” for example, seem way too formal and almost sound funny in this personal context. Would you ever use those words in real life? Didn’t think so.
Other times, students get overly concerned with formal academic writing rules that don’t apply in the more creative personal statement. Yes, contractions are acceptable as the Common App is a form of creative writing so it’s less formal than the academic essays you’re used to writing in class and those rigid rules do not apply here.
2) Fixating on Word Count
During your initial writing stage, I recommend ignoring word count and telling your whole story regardless of how many words it takes at first — editing for word count should come later in the 3rd or 4th revision at least (remember that most students need at least 3 revisions to get to the submission stage). Part of the writing process is to write way more than the word count - that's how you get to your best material. I wouldn't cut anything out in your first few drafts and keep writing and seeing where the story takes you - it will be easier to figure out what to cut once you have your first complete draft. Otherwise, you might cut something that actually ends up really important, but you won't know until you're done writing.
If it feels messy, I recommend creating a “Junkyard” at the bottom of the draft where you put everything you’re unsure about. That way, there’s an archive to reference if you change your mind.
Most students want everything to be perfect from the start, but writing is messy. The podcasts you listen to probably record at least a quadruple of what airs. Usually, you don't know what to cut until you've finished the draft. Don’t try to pigeonhole your outline to the word count from your first draft — that’s too early in the process. Think about the filmmaking experience: it's the same process there. How much ends up on the cutting floor?
Once you’re done writing your fully story, follow my steps for cutting your admissions essay for word count then finish your revision by learning how to edit for a final proofread.
3) Picking the Wrong Prompt
Many seniors agonize over which prompt to choose, thinking that decision will make all the difference. Here’s the thing: You don't need to worry about which question you choose - the last question (#7) is completely open-ended, so it's better to choose that one than have to pigeonhole your story into a prompt that's not right for you.
A common mistake for the Common App essay is picking a prompt that forces you to narrow your narrative into a superficial "lesson learned" story that's not right for you rather than being strategic in choosing your essay topic from the start. I advise all students to go with the last open-ended prompt for this reason. I caution against "lessons learned" prompts in particular since those normally lead to forced, cliche answers.
4) Including a Title (and Other Formatting Quirks)
This is a strange one and I’m not sure where this practice came from. My guess is students are so used to adding titles to their essays for school that they assumed a creative writing essay should need one as well. Spoiler alert: you don’t. In fact, I always cut the title since it usually gives away the major theme of the essay upfront and reveals too much to make the rest of the reading experience compelling.
Another strange formatting quirk I’ve seen is having two spaces between sentences, which is widely considered to be outdated punctuation and could even lead admissions officers to think your parents wrote the essay for you.
Finally, never start your answer by paraphrasing the prompt. This is a common mistake, especially with the supplements which should be treated with the same creative approach as the Common App. Admissions officers know the prompt; repeating it is repetitive and a waste of limited word count. Remember that the personal statement is not a persuasive academic essay you wrote for English class — it’s a creative personal essay.
5) Bragging Too Much
Stuffing all your activities in the admissions essay doesn’t work as compelling storytelling. First, admission officers will see anything impressive elsewhere in your application. Instead of trying to sound triumphant with how busy you are (which makes you sound like bragging), why don’t you show your passion for one activity and dive deeper into what it means in your life?
I understand you feel pressure to stuff all your accomplishments in the essay, but the admissions officers will see this in your application already. The point of the admissions essay is to show them a side of you they can’t see anywhere else. Speaking about all the ways you’re a leader or improving your community can feel forced and cliche, for example, like you’re telling them what you think they want to hear if it’s not a major part of your life.
You never want to give the sense that you’re trying to pad the essay with achievements. Instead of writing about every activity, I would rather you focus on your passion for piano, for example: why you love it, what it means to you, how it’s changed your life, or shaped you in ways that aren’t solely intended to look good on a college application.
6) Sticking to the Philosophical Rather Than the Personal
I advise all students to avoid the philosophical (which is a common mistake learned from academic essays) and instead to stick with the personal. Speaking abstractly about the world invokes the feeling that you’re hiding behind these theoretical proclamations instead of revealing who you are. Remember that the goal here is to get to know you apart from the numbers.
Speaking in bloated philosophical language also makes the essay feel abstract and hard for the reader to relate to. Those types of essays rarely make an impression or connection with the reader - they most often lead to a heavy sigh. The philosophical word vomit often happens in those pigeonhole prompts that make you feel like you’re answering an academic essay. Start from a blank canvas to make sure you get to the personal right away. No cliched “inspirational” quotes either, please.
7) Writing a Cliched Conclusion
Another major personal essay mistake is that your closing paragraph feels cliche and just repeats information you’ve already said earlier in the essay. The personal essay is unlike the academic essay you’re taught to write in English class: the conclusion should not be a regurgitation of the essay but rather a compelling note to end on.
I can imagine the frustration most students feel when getting so close to the finish line and fumbling the rest for time. But remember that the closing paragraph leaves the final impression, so it’s important to devote time and creative energy to get it right. One trick is to go back to the creative opener. Need more help? See my tips on writing a compelling closing paragraph.
8) Writing About the Same Topic In Multiple Essays
If you decide to write about your love of chess for your Common App essay, I recommend picking a different topic for your supplements. Each personal essay should reveal something new about you and writing about the same thing as you did in your Common App essay is a missed opportunity. Each essay, no matter how small, should teach the admission team something new about you.
I recommend creating a master list of all the essay prompts you have to answer for all your schools and then distilling which topic works best for which prompt, so you’re mindful and strategic in advance instead of scrambling to write something that isn’t meaningful to you at the last minute. Most students have at least 5 ideas they’re choosing between — pick the one closest to your heart for the Common App essay and then try the other 4 for the supplements. If you’re unsure of which to choose, try writing a long essay for each of them and pick the one that flows the easiest for the Common App essay. Then shorten the rest for the supplement essays.
9) Forgetting Crucial Context
Timeline is crucial in a personal essay - you always want to include time markers to ground the reader in your story, so we understand how young you were when your passion started, for example. If you’re writing about something from the past and how it influenced your present (or future), always add your age or grade year throughout so we’re not lost in the reading experience regarding how much time has passed.
The same goes for telling us basic bio details about your life that are so familiar to you that you end up taking them for granted and forgetting to include them. If you write an essay about your immigration, for example, don’t forget to include mentioning where you immigrated from.
Editor’s Note: This post was originally published on May 2020 and has been updated with new relevant information.
Want to work with me on avoiding these common mistakes in your admissions essay draft? See my affordable college essay classes below! Spots are limited to ensure personalized attention.
Unsure of your personal essay topic or where to even begin? We’ll discuss strategies for choosing your Common App prompt, ideas to get you started, and journaling questions to help you find your story. Plus, students will be able to submit essay ideas anonymously for a rapid live edit on-screen to find your topic and determine the best storytelling approach. The 1-hour live workshop class includes:
60-minute interactive class discussing student-submitted essay topics
Live edit of essay topics on-screen followed by group discussion
5+ brainstorming ideas to help you find your story
Why certain topics work and others don’t — and how to know the difference
Limited to 10 students for personalized support
Every Common App essay needs multiple rounds of edits before it’s ready for submission. You’ll learn the techniques of self-editing including common mistakes to avoid and what to consider when cutting for word count. Plus, students will be able to submit their drafts for an anonymous live edit on-screen. The 1-hour live workshop class includes:
60-minute interactive class discussing student-submitted essay drafts
Live edit of Common App draft on-screen followed by group discussion
Individualized suggestions for improvement
Line-by-line edits and big-picture strategy ideas
Limited to 6 students for personalized support