The Personal Approach to the Personal Statement
The latest news, tips, & tricks for surviving the college admissions game
Angel had a unique situation. She was applying as an internal transfer to NYU Stern from NYU CAS (College of Arts and Sciences), which is notoriously difficult to accomplish. We knew she needed a standout transfer essay to explain why this major switch was necessary.
Read MoreAt this point in your academic career, you’ve heard of the creative writing mantra — show, don’t tell. You want the admissions officers to live out the story as you did by engaging them in every nitty-gritty detail. But what does that actually mean and how do you do that? I broke down the technique in five easy-to-follow suggestions from admissions essays that worked.
Read More1) Don’t Sound Negative
Even though you’re leaving your current school for negative reasons, you have to be strategic in how you explain them so you don’t sound like you’re complaining. It’s a difficult balance to strike, for sure, but you have to be very concrete in what change you’re looking for so it doesn’t sound like you’re bad-mouthing your current situation (or worse, not appreciating it for superficial reasons like rankings).
You don’t want to sound like you're making excuses and not taking the initiative to make your current college work for you. You want it to seem like you've exhausted every resource and really belong somewhere else. Listing specific examples of what is missing will help with this, in addition to listing what you hope to have at your next school.
Read MoreAs confusing (and terrifying) as all this is, here’s the major takeaway: for racial and ethnic minorities, your admissions essay is now more important to your application than ever before. Colleges still want diverse student bodies, and they’re going to be using admissions essays to make that happen. And the good news is, essays about personal struggles or triumphs tied to one’s race or heritage were already one of my favorite topics to explore with my students, because they provide such a unique insight into who you are as a person, what your values are, and how you face challenges.
Read More1) Start a Journal
The hardest thing about a personal essay is finding your voice—most high schools focus on the academic essay, which is more stiff and formulaic than the admissions essay. An easy way to discover what you sound like when you're not citing academic sources or analyzing text is to start a journal. Every night before bed, take a few minutes to write about your day or what's worrying you or even try some of the prompts in the Common App. The relaxing background should let you tap into your personal voice without the pressure of sounding academic. At the very least, you'll have some snippets saved away for the draft writing stage.
The waitlist letter is your last chance to show “demonstrated interest” and maybe get on the admit list if enough students don’t accept. In fact, some colleges are notorious for accepting fewer students than they need and then filling up their freshman class with the waitlist (this way, they get higher on the US News & World rankings…sneaky, I know). So you may have a better shot than you think. Especially this year when your chances of getting in are better than ever. At the very least, you’ll know you’ve done everything you could.
1) Find Your Specific Admissions Representative
Read MoreCalling all juniors! Who’s ready to tackle the dreaded Common App personal essay this summer?
Starting in June, I’ll be accepting a limited number of students to my virtual Summer Essay Bootcamp covering everything from finding your topic to editing your draft. This limited series of virtual admissions essay classes provides hands-on help for those on a budget. There are currently only 8 sessions available with a maximum student cap for each (some at just 5 students per session!), so don’t hesitate to save your spot.
Read MoreTOPIC 1: Redefining The Idea of Masculinity While Growing Up With Two Moms
SUCCESS RATE: Accepted to all 10 schools he applied to, including Cornell University, Dartmouth College, Yale University, Princeton University, and the Massachusetts Institute of Technology.
WHY IT WORKED: Colleges want to see exceptional students who overcome adversity because it shows strength and students are not afraid to challenge societal norms, because that takes risk. This essay manages to convey both at once.
Read MoreI’ve noticed an alarming trend among my students.
The one-giant-block-of-text essay. The no-paragraph-breaks essay. The good-god-my-eyes-are-going-to-bleed-if-I-read-this essay.
My big piece of advice is not only to separate your essay into multiple, distinct paragraphs, but also to separate each paragraph with smooth transitions and topic sentences that help the reader follow along with your narrative. Better yet, aim for short and sweet paragraphs for easy reading. Remember that admissions officers are going through 100s of these essays a day — don’t make it harder for them to concentrate with one dizzying block of text that’s difficult to read.
Read More1) Make a list of all your updates since you submitted the original application
Start by thinking through every category of your life - academics, extracurriculars, personal, etc. Then write a bullet point list of every update you can think of for each category. Once you’re done, pick the most exciting and impressive updates to share for one powerhouse paragraph of examples. Think: winning an award, receiving a grant, making it to the championship, etc. The goal with the update paragraph is to show why you’re a great pick for the college. Another great way of using the update info is to craft your narrative and remind the admissions officers that you’re passionate about climate change, for example. Remember to tie in academics too: how you were able to maintain or improve your grades despite harder classes and more extracurricular involvement. Don’t forget to leave anything out that they’ve already seen in your original application - the focus here should be on new information only.
Read MoreWhat makes a great (admissions) essay?
Something totally real and unpretentious. Admissions officers want to get know the real you apart from a dizzying algorithm of numbers, extracurricular hours, and GPAs. Give them a slice of life that reveals who you are instead of something fake that you think sounds good. I wrote about cooking with my grandma—so simple it's almost cliche. But I used that anecdote to explore my immigrant identity and show what I’ve overcome.
Read MoreBreak The Essay Down Into Smaller Goals
Thinking of writing the 650-word admissions essay in its entirety is pretty overwhelming. Instead, create smaller, less-stressful goals. Start with brainstorming topic ideas, then journal some outline ideas, then try writing the first paragraph. If you’re still stuck, start with just a sentence. The important thing is to just start - the magic is in the revision process. No one — not even your favorite published author — weaves gold on the first try.
Read MoreI read every admissions update so you don’t have to. In this edition:
Following the trend of almost every college including the UCs, California State University (CSU) — the largest four-year university system in the nation — drops the SAT/ACT requirement for admission. According to the LA Times: “More than 1,800 colleges and universities — nearly 80% of all four-year U.S. campuses that award bachelor’s degrees — have already dropped standardized testing requirements for admissions.” You know what that means: the admissions essay is more important than ever…*breathes into brown paper bag* [LA Times]
When Ben reached out to me, he was convinced he had the best admissions essay topic about helping out in a factory for a summer. After all, his family, friends, and even teachers all said this was a unique way to show his personality. Unfortunately, after multiple revisions, his authentic self just couldn’t come across no matter how hard he tried to make it work. It was an important lesson in not forcing a topic —even if you’re convinced it’s the coolest idea ever— if it’s just not working. Maybe the idea is great but your experience wasn’t impactful enough to write a whole essay about it. The language felt verbose and overwritten, which is another sign the idea wasn’t working.
Read MoreOver the years, I’ve read and edited hundreds of college application essays. To help you during your writing stage, I’ve recapped my most useful edits below so you can avoid the common mistakes that pop up most often in college admissions essays.
1) Using Bloated Thesaurus Speak
Most students think a higher vocabulary (read: thesaurus) will make their essay sound better. That instinct may work for your more formal academic essays, but it’s wrong in the case of the personal statement: the essay should sound how you speak, not a formal academic letter. "Thenceforward" and “heretofore,” for example, seem way too formal and almost sound funny in this personal context. Would you ever use those words in real life? Didn’t think so.
Read MoreLike writer’s block, procrastination is another anxiety behavior that gets in the way of creative writing, especially if what you’re working on what feels like the most important piece of writing that will determine your entire future. No pressure. Try not to break a sweat reading that Common App prompt.
But, just like writers block, the best way to beat procrastination is to get out of your head. (Easier said than done, of course). Here are a few things that have worked with me:
Often when you’re procrastinating on something you don’t want to do, you end up doing other things in an effort to be productive: cleaning, organizing, other homework, etc. Procrastination is a negative cycle, and it gets worse the longer you procrastinate. You don’t want to start the essay and the longer you put it off, the more you feel like a failure. and the worse you feel, and the more you end up putting off. Or you’re just feeling really down about yourself and— see what I’m talking about? Not productive or helpful for anyone.
So take a deep breath and start writing down everything else you got done that day, including basic things you take for granted like feeding yourself breakfast and responding to emails. Before you know it, you’ll realize you got way more done than you thought, which will empower you with the momentum you need to get started.
A simple “done list” is all you need to put yourself on the right track to getting this personal statement done once and for all!
Usually whatever you don’t want to start is stemming from a negative feeling: maybe you’re anxious about it because it feels too hard, or it’s just boring and you don’t want to spend time on it. The best way of curbing that feeling is to picture how relieved you’ll be when it’s over - really bring this visualization to life. Picture how relaxed you’ll feel down to your toes— picture closing the tab on your computer that’s been open for weeks, picture bingeing on Netflix, or whatever it is you will do to celebrate.
Let this picture-perfect vision guide you to opening up that Word doc.
Sometimes, I just need to trick myself to sit and not move in order to write and the best way for me to do that is to literally paint my nails so all I could do is type while they dry. Otherwise, I would be cleaning or finding other random things to do around the house. It’s that simple.
After working with K, she secured a $40,000 scholarship and guaranteed acceptance in the program of her dreams to UNC. I’m excited to share how we worked together with her testimonial!
Read MoreBefore writing about your non-profit for your personal statement, read these red flags that can pop up to admissions officers. Your personal statement is supposed to tell a story of genuine growth. Be honest with yourself: how invested are you in your non-profit? If it doesn’t capture everything you’re about, consider saving it for a supplement.
Read MoreIn fact, just because it’s a shorter supplement doesn’t mean you should leave it for last. The “Why this college?” supplement is actually one of the hardest essays to answer. Ideally, you would’ve visited the campus, researched the school, and spoken to former alums to really know the answer. But not everyone has the privilege (or money) to travel to see schools — especially in the middle of a global pandemic. Luckily, I have some shortcuts for you.
Read MoreSo, you’ve been revising until your eyes gloss over? Words are all starting to look the same and you’re reciting your admissions essay in your sleep? Professional authors spend a long time figuring out just what proofreading process works for them. Here’s the trick for the last step of this writing process: start off with plenty of material (don’t worry about word count until that whole story is there on the page) and then get ready to polish it using the following tips.
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