Testimonial Tuesday: Accepted to Columbia & NYU as a Transfer
/“The time I spent under Yelena's guidance has not only given me an acceptance to every school to which I applied, but also has prepared me so that I can succeed at any of the schools. Yelena's genuine support and care for my improvement has led me to complete each week's assignment while working full time in the military and going to school at night. It was an eye-opening experience to see such an efficient way to write an essay that shows who I really am. Now, I can't wait to use the writing skills at Columbia and future medical schools.”
-H.P., accepted to Columbia University & NYU
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Overusing adverbs (basically, essentially, actually) means that your verbs are not strong enough on their own. Wordy phrases and fragments slow down your narrative. Pedantic words like “myriad” and “plethora” should only be used if you know what they mean - otherwise you come across as someone disingenuous who used athesaurus to sound smarter (something admissions officers can easily see through.)
Inspired by Karyn, here are a few more things I would add to your admissions essay checklist for before you submit: