Testimonial Tuesday: Accepted as a Transfer to Pomona, Columbia, USC, UCLA, UC Berkeley & More
/“I wanted to share my gratitude for the guidance and support you gave me those months ago. Your feedback was immeasurably valuable, and I truly appreciated your accommodation of my various constraints. Most of all, I was moved by your words of encouragement during an application process riddled with worry. Thank you again!”
-Nick, accepted to Pomona, Columbia, USC, UCLA, UC Berkeley, UC Santa Barbara
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Overusing adverbs (basically, essentially, actually) means that your verbs are not strong enough on their own. Wordy phrases and fragments slow down your narrative. Pedantic words like “myriad” and “plethora” should only be used if you know what they mean - otherwise you come across as someone disingenuous who used athesaurus to sound smarter (something admissions officers can easily see through.)
Inspired by Karyn, here are a few more things I would add to your admissions essay checklist for before you submit: